Boundaries are the limits we institute to protect ourselves from being manipulated, used or violated by others and they are necessary.
Often times, we allow others to make us feel guilty for setting limits in our lives. Let’s be honest, some people have the crafty habit of making you feel like the world will suddenly stop turning on its axis if you say no. Set those boundaries anyway!
Recognize, the only people who have a problem with your setting limitations in your life, typically are the ones who are benefiting from your lack of having them. Draw a line in the sand and require that no one dare cross over it. Put a big warning sign at the front gate of your life and put people on notice, that if you intend to enter into my space and be a part of my physical and mental experiences that make up my very existence, there are boundaries, which you must not cross. For most people, how you treat and see yourself is the only indicator needed to show that you have boundaries and deserve respect, and with that it will be reciprocated. Others will demand that you obey their boundaries and shower them with respect, all while disregarding yours and treating you with disdain.
In the last few years, I have had to re-evaluate and reset my boundaries, then reiterate that I have set rules in how I will be treated in my life. Unfortunately, for the first time, I found myself dealing with someone who crossed over that line I had drawn, and I allowed myself to share space with that person whose vibrations are low and energy shady. I allowed myself to be around a mean girl personality and tolerated a situation that made me uncomfortable. Finally, with my re-established boundaries set firmly in place, they were challenged. Again and again and again…they were challenged. With that, I chose to leave the sandbox and no longer play with someone who didn’t know or refused to follow the rules of the game. It was freeing. Setting boundaries in your life is liberating. Choosing self…is liberating!
If you allow people to take liberates with your welfare, some will take advantage of your generosity. You can’t blame Moe, Larry and Curly for beating you over the head again-and-again with the wooden mallet, if you keep standing there submissively waiting for the blow. Set those boundaries and see to it, without wavering, that people handle you with the respect you deserve. At the end of the day…you decide how you will be treated.
Article Written By Kelli Thomas of Earth's Spirit Herbs, LLC